The Slowdown–a parenting poem


To listen to this poem, click here.

Blowing whistles
and the wonderings of a mother

who hasn’t signed up for

soccer

baseball

swimming

art class

Spanish immersion

instead she shifts her son’s head

to drop in a remedy for swimmer’s ear

from swimming

playing

dreaming

Saturday marked by ten, twelve hours sleep

a body in repair

and the luscious knowledge of the intangible

it’s called Rest

“You know the park is just down the street.”

“He can walk there on his own.”

“Everyone here does it.”

What choice does she have?

Sign on the dotted line

put a number on his back

swear fealty to the clock for fear of falling behind

Or what if stop-motion movies

puppets and pizza tag

riding bikes till twilight

made for enough of a childhood?

What if boredom became a challenge?

Live in the world

surf on worksheets

dig up Redstone

write the series about

Super Parnassus the Potato

and his Grape sidekick, The Greginator

this verse is homage to the slowdown

allowing for mothering and fathering

any which way

in the gray lies truth, freedom

and knowing the human who chose you

My First Time: Two Audio Poems for You

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One of the most exciting aspects of blogging is trying new things. There was once a first time that I wrote a poem. Do you remember the first time you rode a bike? How about your first kiss?

I remember my first reading in the mid-90s at Dark Horse Books in Washington, DC. I met one of my best friends that day. And I released a part of my soul. It felt so good to share my art.

In honor of National Poetry Month, I’m broadcasting two poems using SoundCloud. Rochelle Soetan just shared them for the first time on her blog Tuesday Morning Love.

Please take a listen to Jacob’s Bridge, for my son, Providence, Rhode Island

https://soundcloud.com/rebecca-villarreal-author/jacobs-bridge

This poem taught me how I can be present for my son, even when I’m on travel for work. It lightens the guilt (a useless emotion) about leaving and celebrates our ever-present connection through poetry and story.

Please take a listen to Generation Asante, for Wangari Maathai, Nobel Peace Prize Laureate

https://soundcloud.com/rebecca-villarreal-author/generation-asante-a-poem-for

Wangari Maathai is founder of the Green Belt Movement. You can watch an inspiring short film about her here. I first learned about her during my years working at the African Wildlife Foundation. She proves that one person can make a difference every single day. I wrote Generation Asante in gratitude to Dr. Maathai for the air we breathe.

To read Jacob’s Bridge and Generation Asante, please visit Tuesday Morning Love by clicking here.

Asante sana for listening to my first SoundCloud recording!

Courage to be Catherine

Catherine and Daddy FARE

Emmy dresses
royalty marathons
picking coach for mommy
dancing around people protocol
knowing when to tip
talk
touch her throat
princesses
tangled with mermaids
surrounded by sentinels
she knows what to eat, drink
sample
she knows the safety
of one hundred orange shirts
cruisin’
for the courage to be Catherine

There’s this little girl, four years old who sings this song: “Milk, eggs, wheat and beef! Milk, eggs, wheat and beef!” Her name is Catherine and those are her food allergies. She stood on the stage at the Food Allergy Research & Education (FARE) walk and sang the song, bobbing her head from side to side. “Come on everybody, sing it with me!” The song has helped her remember her allergies.

Catherine is typically a shy and polite little girl. To see her on stage and to see her take it all in with grace: that she was a race ambassador (thus the green sash) and that she had her own “Cruisin’ for Catherine” team, well, it makes you know that some are born with old souls. And I think it’s an old soul that can handle the precautions she and her family have to take for her life-threatening food allergies. That’s right. It’s a matter of keeping her safe and alive. I have watched her mother, one of my dearest friends, become a major advocate for FARE, and in the process educate everyone around her. This year, she emailed us an article titled,  “What it’s like to be an Allergy-Mom.” For all that I thought I knew, being an emotional support during various ER visits or tests to see if she might age out of one of the food allergies, this article gave me new insight into my friend’s daily life.

As an added twist of kismet, during the last year, Catherine’s dad was diagnosed with serious food allergies as well. And do you know what his reaction was? I’m paraphrasing, but it was basically: “I have nothing to complain about. Catherine deals with this every day. Now she’s not the only one, she’s not alone.” The amount of planning and pressure that her mother goes through is just part of how she breathes everyday. I saw her zip through the grocery store with cases of the foods that her family can safely eat. I’ve known her to laminate instructions for family members and caregivers.

Food is the center of my family’s life. It’s how we celebrate. And today, on Thanksgiving in the U.S., the entire day centers on food, football and oh yes, gratitude. At a recent Weight Watchers meeting, we reviewed all the holiday activities typically scheduled and how many of them revolve around food. One woman talked about her family’s stuffing recipe and how it’s been passed down through the generations and now there’s a granddaughter with Celiac disease so the matriarch doesn’t know how to adjust the recipe and have it taste the same. Here’s my suggestion to anyone facing this dilemma: Start some new traditions! Some can be food-related, visit www.foodallergymama.com for Kelly Rudniki’s most recent post featuring allergy-friendly Thanksgiving recipes or check out innovative yummy products from folks like Dr. Lucy. And think about some non-food related celebrations. This year, we are having the Recycled Box Car Races at my house. It helps me deal with my artistic obsession with cardboard. (I always want to make things out of all of boxes coming from Costco!) And my son can’t wait to beat me in the race. He’s already trash-talking my “Bodacious 8” racecar.

So today, I sing your song, Catherine, “Milk, eggs, wheat and beef!” and I say, thank you for teaching me courage by just being yourself, every single day.

Matriarchs FARE